Humble Pie

Um.. yeah..  Have you ever had one of those moments where you just wanted to melt into the floor?  Most likely you have.. I know I've felt that way on several occasions, most recently thanks to the artistic talents of my dear daughter.. *sigh*

Recently, my children's school held a fundraiser where the kids donated items for auction.  My daughter's class wrote and illustrated 'A Prayer Book for Mom' .. .. I wish I'd have known what they were doing.  I wish I could have 'helped' her come up with a prayer idea.  I wish I'd have had some input also..  But, then I wouldn't have been blessed with her most honest (and loving) prayer.

I didn't feel 'blessed' when I first saw her prayer..  I was mortified.  I couldn't bear the thought of this prayer about my anger being auctioned off to some unknown parish member.  I mean, her name was on it!  That meant MY name was on it!  And those pictures!!  Those deeply emotional and colorful pictures..  *sigh*  I was mortified.  I was ashamed really.. Ashamed that my anger has gotten the better of me often enough that my 8 year old daughter thought I needed a prayer to help me..

After having some time to get over myself, I can now see that she really was trying to help.  She's always had a way with the written word (like her mommy *wink*).  She was watching when I yelled and, quite frankly, behaved like a child myself.  She was listening when I apologized for losing my temper.  It's all there in the prayer.  And her pictures, her oh-so-detailed pictures, show my anger.. but her pictures also show my love.  (And did you notice that at the top there are storm clouds that give way to sunshine at the bottom?.)  She shows my struggle, my constant struggle, to reign in my temper.  The storm passes..  I do still lose my temper on occasion.  More often though, I see this prayer in my mind whenever I feel myself getting angry.  I see the red faced mom with steam pouring out of her ears.  I think of this prayer, and I take a breath.  I remember the loving words from my daughter written to help me, and I feel blessed.